Growing up, I managed to convince myself that dark skinned girls couldn’t pull off colour. Most of my life was spent avoiding colour at all cost, doing all sorts of summersaults and high jumps just to get away. Paralysed by a fear of standing out and insecurities surrounding my skin tone, I hid behind the colour black and created an all colour free zone. Black was my comfort zone and I didn’t plan to leave it, I was happy to blend in and be unmemorable. Being dark skinned, I thought that was my fate.
Insecurities about my skin tone weighed me down for years, a personal hell fuelled by the silent whispers and murmurs I heard around me. I remember people referring to bright colours as shouting, ” oh look at that girl with the shouting dress.” I don’t know about everyone else but the word SHOUTING gave me anxiety and I never wanted to be associated with it. In that way, I often placed myself in a box I had no business being in. I didn’t dare experiment with different colours in my hair, clothes or shoes. I was an all black, hot mess!!
My self-esteem was at an all time low and I felt miserable because I was dressing in a way that did not show my personality for what it really is. The funny thing is, I actually have a very vibrant, colourful and fun personality that I was constantly suppressing and hiding because I didn’t want to be that girl with the shouting personality!
My style journey has allowed me the time and space to grow, learn more about myself and move away from such unfounded, ridiculous insecurities. I’m learning that when I take fashion risks and experiment with different colours and shades, I am the most happy. Why not SHOUT and be true to myself? For me its not about dressing to impress others anymore, its about dressing to express! To express who I am as a style being using my body, from head to toe, as the ultimate canvas for my creativity and spunk.
So when it was time to choose a new hairstyle, I dived into unchartered territory, head first, incorporating blonde into my look. Territory I have never attempted to explore before, until now. I cannot even describe with words with the creative freedom that comes from trying new things and taking that leap of faith to discover what works for you and what doesn’t, stylistically.
They say blondes have more fun, I say this blonde takes more style risks. I just love the flow of these braids and how they look. To neutralise the look I used black braids which have given the hairstyle, bursts of blonde that pop. Do you see the girl with ‘SHOUTING’ hair?? I do and I love it. I am embracing my inner SHOUT and pursing a blonde ambition.
In the spirit of risking taking and experimenting, this past Sunday I used an old poncho to complete my look. Now let me tell you, this poncho has been gathering dust in my closet for the past seven or so years because I had no idea how to style it. Am so glad winter has been so cold this year, pushing me to actually consider wearing it.
In a combination of a modern day Pocahontas, blonde ambition and Benjamin lip stain, I stepped out of my shell SHOUTING and feeling remarkable!
dress to express